ä typische tag inere typisch ouschtralische familie...

us dr letschte sunntigsusgab vom the sun-herald:

A portrait of a day in the life of a typical Australian family (lets call them Michael and Julie Jones, their daughter Jessica, 19, and their son Ben, 14):

The Joneses wake up and head for the bathroom, where they wipe with Kleenex Cottonelle, shampoo with Pantene mier schamponiere mit em aldi and deodorise with Rexona. Michael shaves with Gillette wie dr James and Julie and Jessica insert Libra ig o.

In the kitchen, Ben feeds Whiskas to Soxie and Pedigree Pal to Max, and spreads Vegemite on toasted Tip Top for himself wieder wie dr James. Michael and Julie pour Paul's into their Nescafe Blend 43 and over their Weet-Bix.

Jessica swallows a glass of Golden Circle pineapple and a tub of Yoplait. On the way to her bus, she smokes a Winfield (the first of her four for the day) and chews an Extra so her breath won't smell bruche mr o ab und zue.

Julie puts on a load with Omo, makes Ben a sandwich with Bega cheese and Hans salami, and drives him to school in their silver Holden Commodore.

For lunch Julie makes herself a can of Campbell's. Jessica has an Uncle Toby's muesli bar and a couple of squares of Cadbury's mier hei lieber Schwyzer Schoggi. When he gets some from school Ben has a packet of Smith's and a glass of Milo und Ovo. When she gets home from work, Jessica has two Tim Tams hmm ja, die sy fein! and a can of Diet Coke. Julie's afternoon tea is Arnott's Shapes.

For dinner, Julie makes a sauce with Leggo's tomato paste, McCain frozen peas and John West tuna, to put over San Remo rigatoni. Michael drinks a can of VB, Julie has a glass of Jacob's Creek chardonnay. For dessert they eat Goulburn Valley tinned fruit with Peter's icecream.

Julie covers the leftovers with Glad, to avoid attracting cockroaches (although she sprays with Mortein once a week uiuiui, müesse mier zum glück nid). They wash up with Finish and brush with Colgate. Then they watch TV, using a remote powered by Energiser.

Jessica goes out for a drink with her boyfriend and they end up at his place. If he used a condom, it would be Ansell, but he doesn't, so in ten months time Jessica will be buying Huggies.